Thursday, March 10, 2016

When I realized I was a Disney character...

One day I was watching Disney movies with my kids, nothing new there, but it started to sink in that in one of the movies we watched there was a very similar character to me as a parent. I know plenty of quizzes are floating around that would "tell you" what character you are, but I can tell you myself that I am Marlin from Finding Nemo.

Me and Marlin have some pretty big similarities, we have lost a child (he lost all but Nemo) and lost a spouse. We both have been very over protective, which is just true for people that lose someone close to them, and learned to lighten up and go with the flow.

Marlin wasn't psycho overprotective because he was crazy, he felt the same thing I felt, that if he let Nemo have too much in the real world that he might lose him too, and when you have lost someone you never thought you would live without you just can't imagine making it through another loss.

Now I may not have journeyed the ocean to find my children, but I had to leave Aedan while sitting in the hospital with Avery while he had pneumonia, I had to let Aedan go to school while I sat at home thinking about his father missing these moments, and I slowly began to let them go, now this summer they are both doing summer prep for their first year of school together.

Thinking about it I am pretty impressed with the way Disney portrayed the widowed parent and the range of emotions and journey of healing they must go on to come back to find themselves. It has been nearly three years since I lost my husband and I am just beginning to allow my children more freedom and getting over the fears of losing them too. Life goes on, and we must learn to go along with it.